To sit here and write about the ways that 2020 changed me seems out of touch and honestly irrelevant. Of course, it was a dumpster fire and you couldn’t pay me enough money to do it over, but at the same time, we pulled through and learned a lot of things together.
In the surprisingly complex act of staying alive and sane, we all understood a little bit more about ourselves. I think I can speak for most when I say there has been plenty of time to reflect. Most of all, I am grateful for a healthy family, a loving partner, the best friends I could ask for, and a future full of excitement. While in previous years I would look back and find places where I grew and places where I could improve, collecting a list of resolutions for the year to come, this year I am simply ready to embrace whatever life throws at me.
In 2020, I wanted to improve way too many things. In 2021, I just wanna get to the finish line intact. In 2020, I wanted to travel the entire world. In 2021, I want to get out of lockdowns. In 2020, I wanted to be the epitome of an academic. In 2021, I just want to be an average college student. You get the point, I’m not expecting much. And in doing so, I hope to be pleasantly surprised.
In the past, I have always taken new year’s resolutions so seriously. But giving much less of a shit in the present, who is to decide that a particular day on the calendar needs to signify a complete change. January 10th of 2021 will be no different than December 10th of 2020 and that is fine! The expectations for this year could not be lower and there is absolutely no need to thrive in every sense of the word. Find something or someone that makes you happy. Make some plans and cross your fingers they don’t get canceled. When it’s finally safe, never turn down the chance for a good time, and if your feeling like a night in, that’s cool too. Whatever you decide, know that you are good enough; nobody needs to reset their life at midnight.
Personally, I will be saying yes to anything that brings an ounce of adrenaline into my life. I want to go skiing for the first time, make memories at 4am with my closest friends, get back to dancing with other humans…in person, buy as many plane tickets as possible once borders open back up, take lots of pictures, and love harder than I ever have. I want to get that sexy covid vaccine, learn some Spanish, swim in the Charles River, finally get over my fear of sports than involve a ball (pretty much all of them,) and adding to that last one, accept that I can be absolutely awful at something and still enjoy it. I want to be unapologetically myself and if somebody doesn’t vibe with that, be comfortable knowing I don’t need them. I want to try more foods, go on a hike that’s past my comfort zone, design some cool stuff, look like a badass, and finish my first “adult” job. There are so many things I want to do and I honestly don’t know what they all entail. What I do know is that we only get a few years to be this young and stupid and after a pretty relaxed 2020, I have some making up to do.
Obviously, everyone’s 2021 will be different and if you told me that aliens will takeover come March or that a monster mutant lizard will collapse the ecosystem in September, I would believe you. In the eloquent words of a TikTok I saw yesterday at 3 am, “Listen, I don’t wanna hear a single one of you motherf**kers yell 2021 gonna be my year. We’re gonna walk in real f**kin quietly, DON’T TOUCH NOTHING, and we’re gonna see how it goes. Okay?”
We did it, we got through 2020. 2021, the bar is on the floor. Let’s see what happens.